17. Ashes of the Unwanted
Ashes of the Unwanted is about being passed like a burden from hand to
hand — a teacher nearly rescuing him only for fear to silence the truth,
a mother keeping him for welfare money, a father in Florida refusing him
at the door, and a return to the predator who blamed him for a building
fire and told him to his face he wished he was dead.
By Thomas J. Allen, © 2026
Spoken Word
The teacher saw the monster. She tried to open the cage.
But the monster looked at me and said, "Speak... and what comes next will be worse."
So a terrified child lied to the world, and the rescue walked away.
I didn't know I was closing the door on my own escape.
I just became a meal ticket... a way to bleed the state.
Verse 1
Passed the investigation, swallowed down the fear,
Moved to a new apartment to waste another year.
She kept me for the welfare, a pawn upon the board,
A child treated like a debt that couldn't be ignored.
Then the old man paid the toll to send us to the heat,
A one-way trip to Florida, an orchestrated cheat.
To dump me with a father who never gave a damn,
To leave me as an orphan in a hollow, empty land.
Pre-Chorus
My grandmother was a saint, shining in the gray,
The only one who showed me love before it washed away.
But the man she raised was broken, spoiled, cold, and blind,
No pity for his own flesh, no mercy in his mind.
When he saw the trap they set, he pushed us from the door,
"Get out of here," he told us. He didn't want me anymore.
Chorus
Ashes of the unwanted, passed from hand to hand!
A ghost inside a family that I couldn't understand.
Traded like a burden, locked inside the dark,
Every door they closed on me left another mark.
Denied by the father, betrayed by the mother,
Just a soul they tried to bury, handed to another.
Verse 2
A thousand miles backward, stepping off the train,
Returning to the nightmare, returning to the pain.
I stood there in the doorway, staring at the beast,
The old man with the fangs, furious his trap had ceased.
He gave me such an evil look, a venomous regret,
Murder in his hollow eyes that I will not forget.
He wanted me erased that day, right there upon the floor,
But I survived the devil, and I walked back through his door.
Bridge
Another year of shadows. Another year of hate.
Until the smoke alarms rang out and sealed another fate.
A fire in the building, walls burning in the night,
I wasn't even in the room, but I was in his sight.
The perfect little scapegoat, the blame was mine to hold,
A match struck by the devil in a house so dark and cold.
Chorus
Ashes of the unwanted, passed from hand to hand!
A ghost inside a family that I couldn't understand.
Traded like a burden, locked inside the dark,
Every door they closed on me left another mark.
Denied by the father, betrayed by the mother,
Just a soul they tried to bury, handed to another!
Outro
He looked me in the eyes through the smoke and the dread...
Showed me his fangs...
And told me he wished I was dead.